I feel like I'm getting back on track. Yesterday I had a few hours of writing time while my boy went to his dayhome for the last scheduled time before summer properly begins next week, and I got pro-active about my query letters for my screenplay. I sent out four at the same time, because all of these agents didn't mind multiple submissions. The process, once again, is hopefully crawling somewhere and not at a dead and discouraging stop.
I borrowed Pretty Woman from a friend the other day because I hadn't seen it in forever, and Jason was out of town, so the necessary ingredients were in place for a chick flick night. As I watched it, I was flooded with happy memories of watching that movie with my friends when I was in high school. Twenty years later, the same movie still transported me away into a different world, as all good movies are capable of doing, no matter when you watch them.
I've been so focused on writing my memoir that I've allowed my newest screenplay to fall by the wayside. Yesterday I sat outside on my deck, picked up my fancy pen (thanks, boss!) and worked on it. The old panic returned for the first fifteen minutes, when I was stalled out and couldn't think of where to go, and then slowly the magic descended, and my pen was flying across the page. Ideas sparked and flowed, and I hit my goal of three pages and sailed right past it. Then I wrote a quick article for Gear4Guys, and sent off my four query letters to new agents.
I proved to myself that I will work when I give myself the time and space to do so. I walked in the sunshine and heat to pick up William, then we read and dozed a little in the afternoon calm, and walked to get Ava from one of her last days of school. In the evening, we strolled down to the farmer's market as a family, and enjoyed visiting with friends while the kids buzzed around, high on life and ice cream.
It was a good day, and I've slowed down enough inside to really appreciate what is going on around me and within me. Awareness is an important goal. I want to be fully present in my own life and with my family and friends. Not thinking of the next thing on my list, and not hurrying constantly to achieve, but intentionally slowing down to stillness. It's the journey that matters, not the destination.