I'm really enjoying this version of myself while on vacation without the kids. I'm relaxed, I'm fun, I'm not stressed or busy. Being relaxed does wonders for the system. It's like a reboot of our personality, with our best possible self coming out into the light.
It reminds Jason and I why we fell in love in the first place, to be away with no responsibilities and simply a sense of fun and adventure to guide our way. I'm starting to miss my kids, and think about our reunion tomorrow, but for right now, this moment, I'm fully embracing who I am apart from my family role. I am only myself, with nothing else to think about, and it's an important reminder of who I really am.
I think we all need these breaks because it clears our vision. I'm not always grumpy and harried and irritated by squabbling kids and my messy kitchen. Sometimes I'm really fun, and have energy and a witty comment to inject into any situation. Often I focus on the nitty gritty of life and forget to look up and appreciate my good qualities - the reasons that Jason was drawn to me in the first place.
This has been a wonderful trip. Not scheduled and therefore exactly what I wanted to counteract my usual structure. I have been completely relaxed and each day has seemed long and open, stretching in front of us like a gift, waiting to be opened and savoured. It's coming to an end, but today I have another chance to remember who I really am as a person, and to enjoy her company.